The Best Gift He Can Give

Spiff has a slight problem. Anyone who has met him figures it out in short order.

He doesn't like to spend too much time around people.

It doesn't matter who you are. It doesn't matter how much he loves you or you love him. It definitely doesn't matter if his huge head traveled down your birth canal and split you in two. It doesn't matter if you are drop dead gorgeous. He would even do this to Mario, or even any Pokemon character that crossed his path. A few short words, a quick greeting, and then - poof! Gone. If you blink, you may miss him.

This behavior has baffled many people. He's so chatty, they don't understand why he just up and disappears. He has hurt friends, classmates, and even family members. Nothing sends a mixed message like a "Hi, how ya doin!" and before you can answer, the person asking the question is gone. You're left standing there, in mid-sentence, wondering what you did to make him disappear.

I'm here to tell you that it's not you, it's him. It's also the Asperger's.

My son has the attention span of a gnat, and if you catch him on a day that he is unmedicated, well, let me just say bouncing off the walls is common.

What is similar to teenage behavior; barricading yourself in your room is also a typical Aspergian behavior. And he does it well.

He's also hurt his grandparents with this behavior. Deeply.

There have been some developments in our family recently. Some medical issues that require quick medical attention and surgery this week. Needless to say we are concerned and not a little bit frightened. And hopeful. And because Spiff is older now, we felt it best to share with him what is going on and to prepare him for the long road ahead. We expected him to not really "get it", and not really react.

I also want it on record that people who are on the Autistic Spectrum DO show emotion. They are capable. It DOES happen.

We discussed what was going to take place. We discussed what he could say, what he should say, and what he could not say. We also told him that he needed to engage people in conversation more, and discuss things with people and LISTEN to what they have to say. A Conversational Lesson 101, if you will. A way to help him stick around just a little bit longer when people talk to him, and try a little bit harder to join in with what other people are talking about.

To break out of his self-imposed shell.

He'll start tomorrow with his Grandfather. It's the best gift he can give him.